One of my first ever posts on this blog was about flame keeping, such a lot has changed since then. The first year was spent with the flame lit on the waxing moon, and I really did get so much from the experience.
In the second year, the flame was lit on the last quarter of each moon, and this became a real struggle. All the stuff I got from it was about loss and isolation, it became draining and hard work. I kept up with it though for a long time, through the bad dreams and messages, until illness and death came to my family, and I just didn't have the time any more, through my fathers illness and death, the bereavement and the funeral, and I just got out of the habit.
This year I have decided to take it up again, but on my terms, I'm not going to follow the schedule set by the Goddess Temple.
What I found without the flame, was that I lost track eventually of the moons cycle and knowing where and when I am in the grand scheme of things, and in March this year I decided to take it up again, following this simple schedule - during the light half of the year I intend to light the flame on the first quarter of each moon, and in the second quarter I shall keep it on the last quarter. So I'm not just picking the easy part, but at least I feel it is in synch with the solar cycle as well, and if things get hard again, I know that it will end, and when.
The spring equinox came, just after first quarter, so my first run was that there was no flame in the switch over from dark to light - this I found interesting in itself and I hadnt thought about that. So, April was the first lighting of the flame, and I picked up a routine again. The first time round, it took a few months to settle in with the routine until things started to kick in, so I didnt expect much from the first one, and basically it is aimed at getting me into the flow of the lunar cycle again, not as a tool for anything else.
So, my first time was just a peaceful and relaxing time, spent in ritual and meditation, the closing evening came, with more meditation, and I sat with it as the sun set, watching the colour of the sunset through the window match the colour of the flame, until it was over.
It was the end of my working week, and a beautiful clear sky, so after the flame keeping was over i decided to go out and gaze at the night sky, somewhere seclude, not really knowing where - and that will be my next post :-)
Friday, 3 May 2013
bit more about Alder
There was some practical work I did with Alder as well, Different parts of the tree can be used to extract different coloured dyes.... if you want to dye cloth with it, then you need to look at how to dye cloth, because you need to add something to the dye, and something to the cloth to make it stick, I just wanted to extract the colours to make paints with, so I made watercolour paints from the tree and in the end painted a picture with them.
What I want to share is the processing of fresh bark to create a red paint. You need a piece of alder wood with fresh living bark on it, and to take that respectfully. What I did was to check all the trees until I found one with a damaged branch, and after connecting, I sawed the damaged part to give it a clean cut that would heal better for the tree and be less likely to cause infection. I also gave an offering to the tree.
At home, to process the bark, first lightly shave the outside of the bark to remove a slight layer and with it all the bird shit and lichen etc, and then strip the full layer of bark from the wood, in small strips is ideal if you cant get it off in one go. What you need access to is the inner surface of the bark.
Then, you simply chew it for as long as you can. Your mouth will fill up with saliva, and then spit it out into a bowl. Use this as your paint, or dye substance. It will look like a bowl full of bloody vomit.
If you dont want to paint, this is the side effect I wanted to share really - when I did this I was full of cold, feeling really bad, but wanted to get this paint made so I ended up chewing 3 mouthfuls of the prepared bark. It worked a miracle actually, I felt right as rain very quickly, and my cold was completely gone - until the next day when it had worn off and the cold came back as bad as before.
Alder is a member of the birch family, and the bark is full of aspirin -BEAR THIS IN MIND IF YOU HAVE AN ALLERGY! So I had been dosing myself up with natural aspirin. Probably not a good idea to do this every day, but it worked extremely well for about 18 hours :-)
I eventually made paints with the bark, catkins and cones - leaves were not out to make dye from, but I painted a picture with the paints -
In addition to the painting, I used the piece of wood I had taken as incense, I found that the wood, shaved and burnt on charcoal had a really lovely smell to it, very much like raspberry.
What I want to share is the processing of fresh bark to create a red paint. You need a piece of alder wood with fresh living bark on it, and to take that respectfully. What I did was to check all the trees until I found one with a damaged branch, and after connecting, I sawed the damaged part to give it a clean cut that would heal better for the tree and be less likely to cause infection. I also gave an offering to the tree.
At home, to process the bark, first lightly shave the outside of the bark to remove a slight layer and with it all the bird shit and lichen etc, and then strip the full layer of bark from the wood, in small strips is ideal if you cant get it off in one go. What you need access to is the inner surface of the bark.
Then, you simply chew it for as long as you can. Your mouth will fill up with saliva, and then spit it out into a bowl. Use this as your paint, or dye substance. It will look like a bowl full of bloody vomit.
If you dont want to paint, this is the side effect I wanted to share really - when I did this I was full of cold, feeling really bad, but wanted to get this paint made so I ended up chewing 3 mouthfuls of the prepared bark. It worked a miracle actually, I felt right as rain very quickly, and my cold was completely gone - until the next day when it had worn off and the cold came back as bad as before.
Alder is a member of the birch family, and the bark is full of aspirin -BEAR THIS IN MIND IF YOU HAVE AN ALLERGY! So I had been dosing myself up with natural aspirin. Probably not a good idea to do this every day, but it worked extremely well for about 18 hours :-)
I eventually made paints with the bark, catkins and cones - leaves were not out to make dye from, but I painted a picture with the paints -
In addition to the painting, I used the piece of wood I had taken as incense, I found that the wood, shaved and burnt on charcoal had a really lovely smell to it, very much like raspberry.
A bit about Alder
A while back, I was set some 'homework' to do something with Alder, I got really immersed in it and came up with an essay and kind of presentation thing, but then never got the chance to deliver it, so I kept the information for myself.
However this week I have been reading someone else's blog and they've presented up an amount of information that really made me excited and tingly because I really understood what was going on with the journey of receiving it, so I thought, maybe i should pass that on and put my essay thing up here and share it, I'll see how it works, it was meant to be spoken and have things passed round and not just read, but I'll see how it goes.....
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However this week I have been reading someone else's blog and they've presented up an amount of information that really made me excited and tingly because I really understood what was going on with the journey of receiving it, so I thought, maybe i should pass that on and put my essay thing up here and share it, I'll see how it works, it was meant to be spoken and have things passed round and not just read, but I'll see how it goes.....
_____________________________________________________________________________
I have found myself very much inspired to explore what Alder
is about, and I have enjoyed spending time on this. I found myself following
several different strands on this project, and in the end it all linked back
together again, so here is my experience with Alder.
Firstly I looked at the Fire and water aspects of Alder,
this is how we look at Alder today, holding the two opposing elements in
balance within itself. As a timber, Alder has to be used either completely bone
dry or completely immersed in water. Anything in between these two extremes
makes it virtually un-useable and it quickly rots. Immersed in water, it lasts
virtually for ever and becomes like stone so it is used in foundations laid in
water, in bridges, and indeed most of Venice is built upon Alder pilings. In
the Bronze Age, wooden strongholds called Crannochs were built on Scottish
Lochs, and the alder posts of the supporting platforms still remain.
When it is properly dried out, it gives one of the best
firewoods, but it has to be PROPERLY dried out, and it makes the best charcoal,
which because it is very fine, is used to make gunpowder.
At Imbolc, I was left with a tarot card depicting a warrior
queen holding both fire and water. This warrior queen I know very well, it is
She who holds my feminine side and is represented as the tattoo on my back. So,
I was looking for quotes about Alder, at this stage avoiding references to
Bran, and I found this, from Tree Magic by Gillian Kemp –“Alder is a symbol of
strength in battle and shows that you will win in battle. The orange/red sap is
associated with blood and war. Alder is sometimes known as The Goddess Tree and
is also called The Very Battle Witch of Trees”
As I read this, I recognised immediately that the descriptions matched Her very well,
- the Alder is special to Her, as is the
raven and other black birds. Also it is said about Alder that it contains a
door to the fairy realms within its trunk, and if they do not want to be seen,
they come and go un-noticed in the form
of crows and other black birds.
Now, this connection with the Alder struck me, because a
couple of weeks earlier I had made a shrine to her at the place where I have
felt her the strongest, and this just happens to be under an alder tree on the
river Dee and it in in the tree that I made the shrine.
Incidentally she has a roman counterpart in Minerva, who has
a shrine built by the romans , also on the banks of the Dee. Minerva is the
goddess of wisdom and is always depicted in full battle dress, with a coat of
mail, helmet and spear, but she was only worshipped as the goddess or war in
Rome itself. Her sacred plants are the
olive, mulberry and Alder, and lo and behold, her main annual festival was held between March 19 -23, the equinox, which is
also when Alder holds sway.
Which leads us on to Bran – Robert Graves says about the
battle of Achren – “In ancient times, to know the names of the enemies gods was
to be able to summon them and fight a battle of a different kind. In the battle
of Achren, there was a man on one side and a woman on the other, who unless
their names were known, could not be overcome” And he quotes –
Sure hoofed is my steed, Impelled by the spur
The high sprigs of Alder are on thy shield
Bran art thou called, of the glittering branches
Sure hoofed is my steed in the day of battle
The high sprigs of Alder are in thy hand
Bran thou art, by the branch thou bearest
Amatheon, the good, has prevailed.
This battle is taken to be a battle between trees, Bran
representing Alder and the underworld, and Gwydion representing Ash and this
world on the other. As Bran’s name is deduced from the Alder on his shield and
in his hand, he succumbs to the battle and loses, and Ash is victorious. This is
symbolic of the spring equinox, the passing from the dark half of the year to
the light half of the year. All the trees are seemingly bare, but the alder is
in full bloom with its yellow catkins. After the equinox the ash will take over
and with it, life will return to the other trees and the land will become leafy
and fully alive again.
This brings me to Bran, and Alder’s connection to him as
told in the Mabinogion, but before I do that, I want to meander again…
A couple of years ago, I spent time doing some workaround
Bran at Cader Idris, centring around one particular route to the summit, and
more importantly, the relationship of the landscape with the summit.. This
represented six months’ worth of work, so I will have to summarise and hope it
makes sense.
On the northern side of Cader Idris, in the valley, are a
set of standing stones and a lake called Llyn Gwernan. Gwern being the welsh word for Alder. Local
folklore says that this lake was inhabited by a green man who would watch
strangers climbing up the slopes of Cader Idris, and when they got near the
top, he would call in clouds and wind
and make them lose their footing and fall to their death. He would later go and
collect their bones and bring them back to be kept in the lake. Certainly, the
whole of the northern side of Cader Idris is clearly visible from this lake.
The key words that I took from this were ‘strangers’, ‘bones’ and ‘lake’ – so,
treating this ‘lake of alder trees’ as a
sacrificial lake, I spent time getting to know the spirit of the lake,
meditating on its shores, giving offerings of bone and my hair, and asking
permission to work spiritually on Cader Idris.
Now, when I look at the story of Branwen in the Mabinogion,
Branwen had a son called Gwern, he was half Irish and half welsh, representing
the union of the two opposite nations. The story says –
“As soon as they sat down, they made peace, and the boy was
invested with the kingship. When the peace had been concluded, Bran called the
boy over to come to him. From Bran, Gwern went over to Manawydan, and everyone
who saw the boy loved him. Nissyen, son of Eurosswydd called the boy to come
from Manawydan to him, and the boy went willingly. At that, Evnissyen said “Why does my nephew, the son of my sister,
not come to me?” Let him go gladly, said Bran, and Gwern went gladly. “By my
confession to god”, thought Evnissyen, “This outrage I am about to commit is
one the household would never expect”.
He rose and took Gwern by the feet, and at once, before a man in the
house could lay a hand on him, he thrust the boy headfirst into the flames.”
Now – when I looked at Gwern from the Mabinogion, I felt sure that this was representative of
some kind of sacrifice, but I couldn’t quite work it out in my head. Writing
this now, if we consider that Gwern is an Alder tree, Bran represents the land,
Manawydan represents the sea, Nissyen and Evnissyen are brothers – equal but
opposites: Light/dark, day/night, summer/winter, good/bad - we have the makings
of a ritual sacrifice of an Alder - the
joining of two opposing sides, invested with kingship, taken from the land,
immersed in the sea, removed from the sea in daylight (maybe the summer
solstice) and burned as a sacrifice in darkness (maybe the winter solstice) by
which time the timber could have dried out enough.
There was still something missing, so I researched more
-
Kundalini is life energy, most of our understanding of it
now comes from eastern tantric practice, but it is a real force in
everything/everyone that is raised through the chakras. It has a lot of similarity to the druidic
term ‘nwyfre’. At this point, I have
limited understanding of the language around this system, but I know kundalini
experientially.
My basic understanding is that the energy is represented as
a serpent coiled three and a half times around the base chakra at the bottom of
your spine. Within each person is 2 polar opposites… male/female,
light/dark… usually referred as
masculine and feminine and it is the uncoiling and raising of each of these
energies so that they intertwine and connect that raises a huge amount of
energy. It is envisioned either as a goddess or else as a sleeping serpent,
hence a number of English renderings of the term such as "serpent
power". In reiki this is symbolised
by the glyph with 3 and a half spirals and a cross bar which is pulled
backwards and forwards drawing positive and negative and it is the interplay
between the two polar opposites that creates the energy. This can also be used
between two people, not necessarily a man and a woman as their energies can be
raised sometimes in a sexual type situation, but the interplay is on a
spiritual or divine level to create a divine union or marriage which sparks off
creation. Each of us holds this within ourselves, individually it is a ‘doing’
or ‘action’ force like the adrenaline rush but once raised can be held and
channelled into a project or task.
Going back to Gwern and the ritual in the Mabinogion, what I
can see here is that it says that Branwen is kept prisoner – she is “driven from
her husband’s chamber and made to cook for the court, and not less than three
years passed thus…” So in terms of status, as well as position within the
castle, she has moved from the top, to the bottom - from queen to servant, from
the chamber at the top of the castle, to the kitchens at the bottom, and she is
there for no less than 3 spirals of the solar year. After these
3 years we have the meeting of the polar opposites – opposites contained
within the one. Branwen and Bran are re-united. Brother and sister. Gwern
himself is a union of two opposite sides – Irish and Welsh. He is passed from land to sea (two brothers),
from light to darkness(two brothers), presumably storing up kundalini energy in some way before being
burnt in the hearth fire and the energy released resulted in a battle which
destroyed all the Irish and all the welsh bar 7 people.
How can this work? Well here’s the second part of this
thread…
Looking into the use of alder as
a sacrificial substance, I found some research into Horse skulls and the use of
an ‘Alder-Horse’ as a depositional sacrifice in buildings. Although the focus
of this is in Finland, the custom also took place in elsewhere in Europe
(mainly Southern Scandinavia and the British Isles)
Deposits seem to be made at the borders of a building, and
especially at the openings, such as the door, windows and chimney and in
corners. Other contexts are in walls, under floors, in the roof constructs and
the hearth.
The horse first appears as a building deposit in Northern Europe
in the Bronze Age, but it becomes more common in the beginning of the Iron Age.
During the Iron Age there is seen a trend towards depositing only certain parts
of the horse, namely the skull together with leg bones and perhaps the tail.
Now…The “alder horse”: a folklore example from the 19th
century:
The alder-horse (in Finnish leppähevonen) is known in
folklore both in the eastern and the northern part of the country. This example
is from Kiiminki, and it has been written down in the 19th century and
published in the above-mentioned compilation of Finnish magic practices in 1933
”When a new stable is built a horse is made of alder-wood
and for it a small stable. A blanket for the horse is made from a piece of the
skirt of a woman who has recently given birth, and the eyes are painted on the
horse with the woman’s blood. Barley and quicksilver are placed in a basket and
put in front of the horse. This alder-horse and its stable are put under the
floor of the new stable to give the horses good health and luck.”
(translated by the author) (Rantasalo 1933a, p.9)
The alder-horse is an example of imitative or so-called
homeopathic magic (Frazer 1922, pp.14-43). The actual horse-deposit is replaced
by the image of a horse. One might say that this is definitely a more
economical way to make a horse-deposit than if a real horse was used.
The example is full of magic elements: firstly alder is the
preferred wood in Finnish magic, and the use of the skirt and blood of a woman
who have recently given birth is also very typical.
The folklore example continues:
”If the alder-horse is stolen and put under the thief’s
stable, the horse-luck will follow with it. If the alder-horse is knocked
upside-down, the horses in that stable will die. If the alder-horse is stolen and
the pastures are circled with it and then the alder-horse is buried upside-down
close to an ant-hill on the north-side of the pastures, the horses (of the
stable where the alder-horse was stolen from) die at those pastures and the
horse-luck will not return unless a new stable is built in another place.”
This gives an idea of the ill-willing magic or witch-craft
that people were afraid of. Envy was a really dangerous thing and every
neighbour was a possible witch(Nenonen & Kervinen 1994, p.39ff). It also
shows the believed link between alder-horse and the real horses in the stable.
In Finland the fear
of witchcraft is the main reason given for the deposits in the collected
folklore. There seem to have been a need for protective magic, especially
protecting the borders of a building from outside threats. The feared weakness
of the household’s borders has been noted by both Jari Eilola (2003, p.314), in
his studies of witchcraft and magic in the latter half of the17th century, and
Touko Issakainen (2005, p.272), in his studies of 19th century magic. The
weakest points in a building were the openings, doors, windows, and chimneys.
One interesting reason for depositing is not protection from
witchcraft but actually a malicious act of witchery. When a deposit is secretly
made in another person’s building one is thought to be able to curse the
building or even steal the luck from it.
This fits with Eilola’s (2003, pp.187 and 226) notion that
witchcraft was the act of breaking the borders of a household for example by
introducing an alien object into it.
The meaning of the building deposits as offerings for
supernatural beings has sometimes been suggested as the oldest reason for the
custom (Carlie 2004, p.217ff).This may be true, but even the Finnish folklore from
the 19th century recognizes this meaning. So, it seems that layers of meanings
of different ages have co-existed.
HORSE
SKULLS AND “ALDER HORSE”:THE HORSE AS A DEPOSITIONAL SACRIFICE IN BUILDINGS
-SONJA HUKANTAIVAL
http://www.academia.edu/701476/Horse_Skulls_and_Alder_Horse_The_Horse_as_a_Building_Deposit
Layers of meanings from different ages have existed… but we have here examples of Alder wood being
used as a substitute for animal sacrifice for protection, or as a way of
magically accessing, a building through amongst other locations, the hearth.
And I am bearing in mind that Gwern himself was burnt perhaps as a sacrifice in
the hearth of the castle where the Welsh army had collected. So.. was this Gwern an actual human
sacrifice, or Alder wood imbued with ritually raised life-energy? And for what
reason?
In Hindu mythology there is a basic recurring theme of the creation of the world by the
self-sacrifice of God—"sacrifice" in the original sense of
"making sacred"—whereby God becomes the world which, in the end,
becomes again God. For example in the Rigveda which was composed in the
north-western region of the Indian subcontinent, roughly between 1700–1100 BC,
Purusha is at once supreme being, the cosmos, and as such he is sacrificed
primordially as the very act of creation. As cosmic being, only one quarter of
purusha is manifest; three-quarters of him are eternally unmanifest.
Self-immolated, his creative act becomes a prototype: all sacrifices henceforth
are repititions, reconstructing victim, altar, and even the consequences of
that primeval sacrifice. In other words the human work, in correspondence with
the divine original, recreates the world with each new sacrifice, producing as
not only all living creatures, celestial bodies, the three worlds, and the gods
themselves.
We do not have a ‘Celtic creation myth’ but I have given
these two examples because they illustrate the point. The Rigveda was written
at a time contemporary with pre-celtic culture, and I assume can be thought to
have been held in belief for a long time before it was written down. And it
crops up again in the later, Norse mythology,
where Ymir is the primeval being from whom the universe is made. In the
poem Grímnismál, the god Odin (disguised as Grímnir) imparts in the young
Agnarr cosmological knowledge. In one stanza, Odin mentions Ymir as he recalls
the fashioning of the world from his body:
"Out of Ymir's
flesh was fashioned the earth,
And the ocean out of his blood;
Of his bones the hills, of his hair the trees,
Of his skull the heavens high."
"Mithgarth the gods from his eyebrows made,
And set for the sons of men;
And out of his brain the baleful clouds
They made to move on high."
Coming back to the Mabinogion again, we have a very good
example in the story of Math, son of Mathonwy,
of a human being being made from plants – Blodeuedd, and her story. So
it is possible that in the original story of Gwern, he was a human sacrifice
possibly meant to recreate the destruction of the primal being and re-creation
of the universe. Certainly it seems that the result of this ritual wiped out
the irish, so their nation was re-created, and on return to Wales, it was found
that Bran’s kingdom had gone. (Incidentally, Bran’s head, like the horses
Skulls, was buried in the White Hill in London, and whilst the head was
concealed, no plague came across the sea to this island.)
So it is possible that a human could be fashioned from
plants, from Alder. And this Alder-boy, Gwern can be ritually imbued with life
force to make a living, energetic sacrifice suitable for the purpose… Looking
at the timescale suggested in the story, Gwern is approximately 5 years old, so
rather than imagining a huge alder tree, consider a slender sapling, maybe a
metre or so tall, a staff perhaps, or a wand, or spear? but why Alder?
The internet is full of references that Irish and
Scandinavian creation myths say that the
first man/woman was made from Alder (and the opposite sex from Ash) but I could
not manage to track down one of these myths. However in his study of the
comparative evidence for an origin of mankind from trees in Indo-European
society, Anders Hultgård observes that "myths of the origin of mankind
from trees or wood seem to be particularly connected with ancient Europe and
Indo-Europe and Indo-European-speaking peoples of Asia Minor and Iran. By
contrast the cultures of the Near East show almost exclusively the type of
stories that derive man's origin from clay, earth or blood by means of a divine
creation act".
Wednesday, 27 March 2013
Lessons from the Universe
A couple of weeks ago, I had decided that I was going to buy a drum *this week*. The drum I had in mind had been up for sale for many months and I wanted it. I really wanted it.So, I had budgeted, and decided that if it was still there after pay day, it was mine.
Pay day was 4 days ago...The drum had been for sale for many months, a couple of days before pay day it was still there... I checked on-line and after months of being unwanted on the website, the drum had gone.
So it wasn't meant to be.
The money I had set aside for the drum was £155.
Yesterday I put the wrong fuel in my car, coming out of work tired I put unleaded petrol into my diesel car and having it put right again has cost me £165.18
That is not far out from the money I had set aside for the drum.
So, rather than be all "woe is me" and kicking myself, I am looking at this as a lesson.
I wasn't meant to get the new drum after all, but I was meant to save the money for it. And I was meant to mis-fuel the car. So why?
What I have learnt in the past 24 hours is that I am taken care of.
In the physical sense, everything was taken care of at the petrol station. The gave me their phone to use, I had RAC membership - I could have been stranded there and not known what to do, but at every stage of this I had support and help. All I had to do was ask for it and allow it. My daughter, who was a passenger at the time, was picked up and taken home by her mother. The car was towed to my local garage to be fixed, friends rallied round to give support, work colleagues checked what was wrong and to see if I needed help while I was waiting.
I had 24 hours with no car. I was given a lift into work, and once in work people offered to give me lifts home after my shift.
The garage itself was very busy with the bank holiday weekend, but they made time to get the work done for me.
As below, so above -
The universe/Spirit is taking care of me, and this really does click in with a few insecurities I have had recently, and it really does bring home a message that I got from my equinox trip to Moel Fenlli. Not something I have mentioned to anyone else, I've been quietly working it out for myself. And I may be a sentimental old hippy, but this is precisely the message that I needed right now, there are a lot of changes going on for me this year, and it IS good to have it hammered home that things are going to be alright.
TRUST.
Wednesday, 20 March 2013
Visiting the Other World for Spring Equinox
I had one of those dreams yesterday, the ones that go on and on, telling you something that your sub concious thinks you should know about. So when I got up I went and had a long bath and thought about it, a really long bath until the water was stone cold, but it was productive and I've set myself some goals for this coming year.
Feeling upbeat about it all, I decided that after my night shift at work, I would head to the hills as soon as I finished, and pick myself up from where I left off a while ago. And then I went for a walk because since my dog died, I really haven't been outside anywhere near as much as I should be.
A walk without her..... just wasn't the same, and I came back home feeling a bit down to be honest, but I packed all my stuff into the car so I could go to the hills straight from work, but it was a long shift... and I got to thinking about all the other times I had been to Moel Fenlli with her, and this would be my first time without my companion and guide, and I ended up rather dis-heartened about going out for the spring equinox.
However, I pushed myself, and I had already told people I was going so that it would make it harder for me to back out. On my way out I bought myself a bag of cookies and a yoghurt drink, and as I was at the till I was looking at it thinking "why have I got a yoghurt drink, milk makes me feel sick?" but I was being served so I payed up and went on my way to Moel Fenlli.
And WOW! as I drove up the valley to the hill, I went from my cloudy/bit mild local weather into freezing cold and snow! Everything looked so beautiful and was like I had driven into another world.
I pulled in to the car park and got out of the car, and immediately a robin came up to me and started bobbing up and down in front of me as I was drinking in the scenery. Now I know this is a big Faery place, so I got the cookies out of the car and offered the bird some crumbs, which it ate and then sat next to the car singing.
I really couldn't get over how breath-takingly beautiful the hills and the pass were, so instead of taking the route straight up to the fort, I took the longer route that spirals round the hill, even though it was bitterly cold, and I am Soooooo glad I did.
Everywhere was silent, apart from birdsong and the ravens flying across the valley, and I found myself following a trail of raven footprints. Looking back to take photos of the view, I could see my footprints walking alongside those of a bird - although I'd like to think it was a raven, it was more likely a pheasant, but what the heck, it made me feel good, and also noting that behind me was grey and foggy and where I was heading was bright and sunny.
I got to the cairn at the top of the fort which was shrouded in mist, and I was still blown away by the beauty of it all.
And I sat there a while to take it all in and to relax, I got my drum and a pair of ash sticks out, and it occurred to me that I had milk and biscuits with me, so shared them out with the spirit of place, and then went round and round the cairn, chanting the englyns from the Battle of Achren, calling on the springtime, calling the sun to add strength to the Lady of Spring for her battle, first with the sticks, and then beating a rhythm with my drum, building and building it to a crescendo. Then there was a pause and I did the same again, beating a rhythm for Benlli, king of the hill, and it all got a bit mad and wonderful :-)
On the way down, although I took the shorter route down, I found myself again following the footsteps of the bird, took more photos, the place had a really special magical feel to it, lots of contrasts between green spring and white winter, and I drove home feeling happy and relaxed.
Back at home as I got out of the car again, everything seemed dull and drab, mild, dreary and overcast, and I felt as if I had just returned to the mundane , from being in a different world altogether.
Feeling upbeat about it all, I decided that after my night shift at work, I would head to the hills as soon as I finished, and pick myself up from where I left off a while ago. And then I went for a walk because since my dog died, I really haven't been outside anywhere near as much as I should be.
A walk without her..... just wasn't the same, and I came back home feeling a bit down to be honest, but I packed all my stuff into the car so I could go to the hills straight from work, but it was a long shift... and I got to thinking about all the other times I had been to Moel Fenlli with her, and this would be my first time without my companion and guide, and I ended up rather dis-heartened about going out for the spring equinox.
However, I pushed myself, and I had already told people I was going so that it would make it harder for me to back out. On my way out I bought myself a bag of cookies and a yoghurt drink, and as I was at the till I was looking at it thinking "why have I got a yoghurt drink, milk makes me feel sick?" but I was being served so I payed up and went on my way to Moel Fenlli.
And WOW! as I drove up the valley to the hill, I went from my cloudy/bit mild local weather into freezing cold and snow! Everything looked so beautiful and was like I had driven into another world.
I pulled in to the car park and got out of the car, and immediately a robin came up to me and started bobbing up and down in front of me as I was drinking in the scenery. Now I know this is a big Faery place, so I got the cookies out of the car and offered the bird some crumbs, which it ate and then sat next to the car singing.
I really couldn't get over how breath-takingly beautiful the hills and the pass were, so instead of taking the route straight up to the fort, I took the longer route that spirals round the hill, even though it was bitterly cold, and I am Soooooo glad I did.
Everywhere was silent, apart from birdsong and the ravens flying across the valley, and I found myself following a trail of raven footprints. Looking back to take photos of the view, I could see my footprints walking alongside those of a bird - although I'd like to think it was a raven, it was more likely a pheasant, but what the heck, it made me feel good, and also noting that behind me was grey and foggy and where I was heading was bright and sunny.
I got to the cairn at the top of the fort which was shrouded in mist, and I was still blown away by the beauty of it all.
And I sat there a while to take it all in and to relax, I got my drum and a pair of ash sticks out, and it occurred to me that I had milk and biscuits with me, so shared them out with the spirit of place, and then went round and round the cairn, chanting the englyns from the Battle of Achren, calling on the springtime, calling the sun to add strength to the Lady of Spring for her battle, first with the sticks, and then beating a rhythm with my drum, building and building it to a crescendo. Then there was a pause and I did the same again, beating a rhythm for Benlli, king of the hill, and it all got a bit mad and wonderful :-)
On the way down, although I took the shorter route down, I found myself again following the footsteps of the bird, took more photos, the place had a really special magical feel to it, lots of contrasts between green spring and white winter, and I drove home feeling happy and relaxed.
Back at home as I got out of the car again, everything seemed dull and drab, mild, dreary and overcast, and I felt as if I had just returned to the mundane , from being in a different world altogether.
Saturday, 16 March 2013
Hopefully the last hard frost of the year...
I meant to post this a couple of night ago, looking out of my window I had the most spectacular view of the clear sky with the new waxing moon, with the fires of the setting sun making the sky glow red over Benlli's fort. It was freezing cold that night and the dawn brought a hard cold frost and brilliant sunshine...
Friday, 15 March 2013
Addressing the Mis-Representation of the Divine Feminine
As I write this, we are approaching the Spring Equinox.
Alban Eilir.
The balancing point of light and dark.
The gateway from the dark half of the year to the light half of the year.
The time of the maiden, as she walks amongst us, giving us seeds and turning the land to green again.
I invite you now, to spend a minute or two thinking about how the divine feminine is represented through our rituals following the wheel of the year.
I've spent time thinking about this, and I've found my inspiration coming thick and strong from a source I had not considered before, and as I've delved deeper and deeper into it, the inspiration gets stronger and stronger, to the point where I can see it in the land around me and in the cold wind that swirls the newly falling snow around me.
You know, we have this every year, the transition from the dark half of the year into the light half. From winter into summer. We like to think of it as the days getting longer, the earth warming up, life slowly coming back. You know, gradual and gentle. But it isnt like that. Each year we have an 'unexpected' cold snap. Spring seems to start and then we lurch right back into winter again. I'm telling you -its a battle!
In the 1800's before the Mabinogion was collected together and published, just in the footnotes, Lady Charlotte Guest wrote something about the Battle of Achren. And then it disappears.
It appears again and is expanded by Robert Graves in his book 'The White Goddess'.
So heres the jist of it. On one level, the Battle of Achren is a battle between the underworld and middle world. Between dark and light. On another level it is a battle between the old gods and the new gods. On another level it is a battle between trees - with Alder on one side and Ash on the other. On another level it is the battle between winter and summer, reaching its bloodiest at the equinox.
Alder on one side, Ash on the other. The annoying thing here is that I want to quote something but I cant find it anywhere. According to the internet, Alder and Ash feature in Scandinavian creation myths, where the first man and woman are made each out of one of the woods, different sources give a different tree for each sex and I couldnt find the actual myth, just references to it, but if we take this into account, it also represents a battle between masculine on one side and feminine on the other.
Alban Eilir.
The balancing point of light and dark.
The gateway from the dark half of the year to the light half of the year.
The time of the maiden, as she walks amongst us, giving us seeds and turning the land to green again.
I invite you now, to spend a minute or two thinking about how the divine feminine is represented through our rituals following the wheel of the year.
I've spent time thinking about this, and I've found my inspiration coming thick and strong from a source I had not considered before, and as I've delved deeper and deeper into it, the inspiration gets stronger and stronger, to the point where I can see it in the land around me and in the cold wind that swirls the newly falling snow around me.
You know, we have this every year, the transition from the dark half of the year into the light half. From winter into summer. We like to think of it as the days getting longer, the earth warming up, life slowly coming back. You know, gradual and gentle. But it isnt like that. Each year we have an 'unexpected' cold snap. Spring seems to start and then we lurch right back into winter again. I'm telling you -its a battle!
In the 1800's before the Mabinogion was collected together and published, just in the footnotes, Lady Charlotte Guest wrote something about the Battle of Achren. And then it disappears.
It appears again and is expanded by Robert Graves in his book 'The White Goddess'.
So heres the jist of it. On one level, the Battle of Achren is a battle between the underworld and middle world. Between dark and light. On another level it is a battle between the old gods and the new gods. On another level it is a battle between trees - with Alder on one side and Ash on the other. On another level it is the battle between winter and summer, reaching its bloodiest at the equinox.
Alder on one side, Ash on the other. The annoying thing here is that I want to quote something but I cant find it anywhere. According to the internet, Alder and Ash feature in Scandinavian creation myths, where the first man and woman are made each out of one of the woods, different sources give a different tree for each sex and I couldnt find the actual myth, just references to it, but if we take this into account, it also represents a battle between masculine on one side and feminine on the other.
Robert Graves says about the battle of Achren – “In ancient
times, to know the names of the enemies gods was to be able to summon them and
fight a battle of a different kind. In the battle of Achren, there was a man on
one side and a woman on the other, who unless their names were known, could not
be overcome”
Two old men meet for a game of wits, their movements mirror those of gods, each trying to outwit the other, playing a guessing game, they are directing an ethereal battle which affects us all on here. Each knows that the other has a piece of vital information that must be guessed, and once it is revealed it will allow the leader of a mighty army to deliver the fatal massive blow that will end the battle.
And here we all are with this bloody battle going on around us - dark/winter pitched against light/summer. One side gains the advantage, and then it swings the other way. Sunshine and birdsong one day, snow, sleet and biting wind the next. This is real. This is how it is.
As the days get longer the intensity of the battle increases. Winter knows it is losing ground, so it throws as much as it can against the oncoming Summer. One by one its warriors fall, their blood soaking into the ground. Losses are equally as heavy on the light side too, they are fighting with all they have, neither side will give in until they are down to their last man. Or woman.
Each side has one fierce warrior who cannot be defeated. They fight the hardest and the longest, and they show no mercy. On one side is a man, on the other a woman. Alder and Ash. They only have one weak point - their name, which is kept secret. Until their name is guessed, they are unbeatable and they battle on and on as their comrades lie bloody and dead or injured around them,
Alder holds the land of the dead, As his warriors fall and are trampled as a bloody mass into the ground, their numbers decrease, but there is no giving in, and he summons more to rise and fight, calling up the dead and demons to come and hold their ground.
Ash holds the land of the living. As her warriors fall and lie dying she knows she cannot give in. Behind her the land is alive, there are uncountable births and beginnings waiting on her success. Each of her fallen warriors will be replaced by a new, fresh life, they all depend on her to carry on fighting, never falling, even as she stumbles she will fight on to defend them and gain ground for them, spitting the blood from her mouth to scream into the face of winter and thrust forward with her sword, hacking her way through the demons that seem to pour down upon her.
And it is from there that she gathers her strength, she has the energy of life to move her forward, and however hard the battle, however many blows she takes to her body she will not be defeated, as she sees the demons rise up before her, she knows that they are the last line of defence, winter is still fighting, but it is on its knees.
Alder is in full bloom, his catkins blowing yellow pollen through the air, making Her cough and choke. As she wipes the blood and spittle from her mouth and strives forward to square up to her unbeatable foe, she snatches a sideways glance to the ash buds, poised black and heavy waiting to burst. As the two warriors meet, each rains massive blows down upon the other, it is now a duel, a fight to the death, each waiting for that moment of weakness to occour.....
Between blows there is a brief pause as each sucks in air, their lungs screaming for oxygen, there is a moment of clarity, when they look each other in the eye, and the words come -
"Sure hoofed is my steed, Impelled by the spur.
The high sprigs of Alder are on thy shield
Bran art thou called, of the glittering branches.
Sure hoofed is my steed in the day of battle
The high sprigs of Alder are in thy hand
Bran thou art, by the branch thou bearest
Amatheon, the good, has prevailed."
And thus it is, the tips of beech sprout anew, green again whatever grew... A warrior finally falls defeated, the black buds of ash finally burst and the battle of Achren is over. Spring comes into bloom.
So. bear this in mind in your rituals, as you picture a young maiden in a white dress skipping through fields with flowers sprouting from the hems of her skirt... life isn't like that. Nature isn't like that.
When are scraping the last late frost from your car windscreen one morning, when you look at your garden and find that it has killed off the flowers you planted last weekend when it was sunny and warm, when the emerging potato plants have had their leaves burned on the allotment because you didn't think to cover them over with fleece, and the birds are gathered round the feeders which has suddenly gone empty as their natural food is frozen... spare a thought for the spring maiden, clad in armour and fighting her way through winters grip. She's stumbled, not defeated, but winter hasn't quite lost its grip yet. She's not just some passive pretty thing responding to her lovers touch. Yes she is that - but she so much more besides.
This image of a goddess bringing eggs and flowers and bunnies into the land seemingly because everything about her is so beautiful, when taken to an extreme, can be dis-respectful to the picture of womanhood in general, and it is in the wider world that we should be taking our inspiration for the divine as it manifests itself in the here-and-now. We go on about basing our stuff on Celtic culture, back then we know that women were equally warriors and fought alongside men. Women today in the west have equality, but this has been hard won and fought for. Women have put their lives on the line to bring about equality. And in other parts of the world, this simply does not exist and women have had their voices taken away.
Sometimes we can make her image a bit too passive and accepting of all that the male aspect brings. It is like she lies there sleeping while the sun warms everything up and then she wakes up and thinks "Oh this is nice, I'll just add some flowers to brighten the place up..."
You know... She, and women, have a hand in creating and manifesting the world around us all. And creating a better world to live in isn't always easy or pretty.
This image of a goddess bringing eggs and flowers and bunnies into the land seemingly because everything about her is so beautiful, when taken to an extreme, can be dis-respectful to the picture of womanhood in general, and it is in the wider world that we should be taking our inspiration for the divine as it manifests itself in the here-and-now. We go on about basing our stuff on Celtic culture, back then we know that women were equally warriors and fought alongside men. Women today in the west have equality, but this has been hard won and fought for. Women have put their lives on the line to bring about equality. And in other parts of the world, this simply does not exist and women have had their voices taken away.
Sometimes we can make her image a bit too passive and accepting of all that the male aspect brings. It is like she lies there sleeping while the sun warms everything up and then she wakes up and thinks "Oh this is nice, I'll just add some flowers to brighten the place up..."
You know... She, and women, have a hand in creating and manifesting the world around us all. And creating a better world to live in isn't always easy or pretty.
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